I'm SO Excited...

Tomorrow I'm OFF..to visit my boo aka Jamar in CO. I'm so excited to just hang out with my friend, who I miss more then anything in DC. That boy has got plans and I'm ready for the ride! Hopefully this Valentine's Day will be good to me because I get to hang with some friends I LOVE with all my heart. I'm also going to see my friend Hollywood from Liberty. I haven't seen him in 5 years. Man, time just flies doesn't it?!?

Anywho, I'm sure I'll be back with great exciting adventures to tell. BTW: Just found out this past weekend...I LOVE Hiking!! We climbed up this rock cliff..I was so proud of myself. It was so much fun! I can't believe I waited so long to do it! I'm the kinda girl that loves adventure, but I sorta need to be talked into them! Oh well, it always makes for a good story. :-)

He's JUST NOT that INTO you...

My HEART is overjoyed with the opening day of the movie 'He's Just NOT that into you'. I LOVED this book. It's sad but empowering at the same time. A book written by a man telling us women how much we're worth. He says over and over what we really deserve. So STOP making excuses for bad behavior ladies and walk away with your head held high, because you're worth finding someone who REALLY is INTO you. Here's a few of my favorite quotes from the book.

Cut your losses and don't waste your time . Why stay in some weird dating limbo when you can move on to what will surely be better territory? Don't want to hear it? Fine. Here's the answer you're looking for, "Hang in there, baby. He's not the loser everybody's telling you he is. If you wait and keep your mouth shut and call at exactly the right time and anticipate his moods and have no expectations about communication or your own needs, you can have him!" But please don't be surprised if he dumps you or continues to drag you through a completely unsatisfying relationship.

He is a man made up entirely of your excuses. And the minute you stop making excuses for him, he will completely disappear from your life.

Don't let the "honeys" and the "babies" fool you. His sweet nothings are exactly that. They are much easier to say than "I'm just not that into you." Remember, actions speak louder than, "There's no cell reception where I am right now."

Calling when you say you're going to call is the very first brick in the house you are building of love and trust. If he can't lay this one stupid brick down, you ain't never gonna have a house, baby. And it's cold outside.

He will always be able to play the "friend" card on you. He only has to be responsible for the expectations of a friend, rather than the the far greater expectations of a boyfriend. He's got the ultimate situation: a great friend with all the benefits of a girlfriend, whom he can see or not see whenever he wants to. He may be one of your closest friends, but I'm sorry to say ... as a boyfriend, he's just not that into you.

Beware of the word "friend". It can often be used by men or the women that love them to excuse the most unfriendly behavior. Personally, when I'm picking friends, I like the ones who don't make me cry myself to sleep.

Everyone wants to be loved and needed, particularly by the person who just broke up with us. I understand. What could be better than hearing from the man who just told you he didn't want you in his life anymore ... his sad, wistful, "I miss you so much" voice on the other end of the phone? It's validating. It's exciting. It's irresistible. But resist you must.

A man who wants to make a relationship work will move mountains to keep the woman he loves. If he's not calling you to tell you he loves you and wants you back, it should only be because he's showing up at your new residence to do it in person ... if he's not doing any of that, he may love you, he may miss you, but ultimately he's just not that into you. Stop taking his calls and let him know what it's like to live without you.

Don't be flattered that he misses you. He should miss you. You're deeply missable. However, he's still the same person who just broke up with you. Remember, the only reason he can miss you is because he's choosing, every day, not to be with you.

It's very tempting when you really want to be with someone to settle for much, much less -- even a vague pathetic facsimile of less -- than you would have ever imagined. Remember always what you set out to get and please don't settle for less. These guys exist because there are a lot of women out there who allow them to.

He's sniffing for something better, and when he doesn't find it, he gets lonely and comes "home." It's not that he's so into you. It's that he's so not into being alone. Don't give him the chance to break up with you for the fourth time. (Even the idea of it sounds beneath you, doesn't it?) Reset your breakup maximum to one and move on.

Deciding to get back together with someone is a complicated and difficult decision. Just remember that the person you are getting back together with is the same person who, not long before, looked you in your beautiful face, took full stock of you and all your qualities, and told you that he was no longer in need of your company.

Don't confuse being classy with being a doormat. Classy is walking away with your head held high, graciously, and with all dignity. Being a doormat is offering to drive him to the dentist for his root canal.

He doesn't need to be reminded that you're great.

There's a guy out there who's going to be really happy that you didn't get back together with your crappy ex-boyfriend.

The reason it's so painful when someone disappears is you have to face the fact that the person you loved had probably left you a long time before he grabbed his coat and scrammed. The hardest part is realizing that he was lying to you, in some way, before the moment of vanishing.

Don't give him the chance to reject you again.

Being lonely ... being alone ... for many people ... sucks. I get it, I get it, I get it. But still I have to say that yes, my belief is that being with somebody who makes you feel crappy or doesn't honor the person you are is worse.

Life is hard enough as it is without choosing someone difficult to share it with.

You deserve to be with someone who is nice to you all the time.

The song dedicated to this post is STRONGER by Britney Spears!! :-)

Time Issues..

Time is a crazy thing. It has been two weeks since my past post. I would like to say that the time has gone by fast, but the truth is it's been painfully slow. Every day I have been debating on what my new post would say and I keep changing it. Do I want to talk about my life in the past month? ummm...NO Do I want to talk about some random dude on the metro hitting on me? ummm..NO..maybe next time. You see I just haven't felt like talking. I've been thinking..and thinking alot. Not only have I been thinking, but watching. Watching the relationships around me. I've always been someone who tries to learn from my mistakes and from the mistakes of others. So...I've been watching things around me and my heart is sick.

In the last few months I have really started to notice the broken relationships around me, probably because they reminded me of something I was going through. But I really feel God revealed some truths to me. It's funny because the one thing that has been so frustrating for me in watching these broken relationships has been the issue of time. The reason it's funny is because at Frontline they're doing a dating series and the last point he made in his message was regarding taking the TIME to grow a Christ centered relationship. These broken relationships around me ALL could of been diverted if they had taken the time to grow together in Christ. It's so easy for us to let our emotions run away with us, isn't it?! It's so easy for us to assume God has given us these feelings. BTW: God doesn't give us feelings that's another subject for another time. Anywho, just think with me for a second, what if it isn't God?! What if we're being deceived by our own loneliness or the enemy? What if we're so wrapped up in our own emotions that we can't hear God's truth?

Our Father is amazing and He gives us all Free Will. One thing that has stuck out to me upon hearing these stories of broken relationships has been this question being asked...Why has God allowed this to happen to me? The truth is, which of course nobody wants to hear is He gives us Free Will and it's up to us to listen to Him or ourselves. The deceiver sometimes confuses us in that regard. God won't always stand in our way of making a HUGE mistake..as any good Father He'll allow us to make our OWN decisions and fall, so HE can teach us how to pick ourselves up. You know Todd at Frontline has said multiple times to be careful in our understanding of God, because sometimes we know JUST ENOUGH to make ourselves dangerous. We get proud and arrogant in our understanding. That's the moment the great deceiver can come in and destroy everything you've been working for. In these relationships I've seen..some have been married couples, others have been dating, but ALL were deceived. They allowed their emotions to rush them into unhealthy attachments which fogged the red flags until it was too late and now we're dealing with broken individuals desperate to understand how it happened. It happened because they didn't allow the emotions to calm down before they made life altering decisions. The heart is deceitful, which is why it's so important to hold God's truth in our actions. Love is patient. You know you never hear of people regretting going slow in a relationship, but you always hear of the regrets for going too fast. Love IS NOT an emotion, Love IS an ACTION. The act of giving yourself 100% for someone else without receiving anything in return. Christ on the cross, THAT is LOVE! Warm feelings, good intentions and butterflies in the stomach are not..

So, my advice to my girl friends who are thinking of settling on a guy because you're tired of waiting..Love is Patient. To my guy friends who are so wrapped up in their physical needs they're fogged from the red flags...Love is Patient. To my broken friends who feel like their falling into a bottomless pit desperate for a miracle...Love is Patient. Until we look outside of our wants and learn how to love unselfishly like Christ we're going to continue to be deceived. Our whole world revolves around Time. Every second of every day is scheduled for us. We are a generation of micro managers who want to plan everything out, so we can check it off the list. But if we focus on God's word instead of the craziness around us, He will bring things together in His own time and He's all about His children being patient for His Will. He wants us to stop listening to our emotions and start listening to Him..maybe they'll be the same or maybe you'll be lucky enough to hear a wake up call before it's too late. My emotions have lied, deceived, and hurt me, but my Father is teaching me how to get back up. Just as Peter took his eyes off the Lord and started sinking in the Galilee, it only took a cry for help before our Lord picked him up again. It's a burden on my heart today that my generation refocuses on Him...

"Be patient, then, brothers, until the Lord's coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield it's valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord's coming is near." James 5:7-8

My City...

I'm at this very moment on a bus taking me back to the most amazing city in the world, Washington, DC. The city I love more then anything with the people I adore. There is nothing like leaving home for a little bit to help you appreciate it more when you return. Do you know that feeling when you're missing somebody special and you're apart for a long time? When you finally see each other, you hug, but your special someone hugs you so tight and you KNOW they missed you just as much. You feel so wanted, it's almost worth being apart just to feel that. I missed my city, so much I want to hug it tight when i get back.

I'm so proud to live in a city full of such rich history. The people who walked those sidewalks have shaped our country. They have had a hand on each and everyone of our lives today, some good and some bad, but all beneficial to our future. Those men lying in Arlington have given us our life as we know it. One by one they fought for a higher purpose. They understood that freedom isn't free. Freedom is a bloody long exhausting path. Even young boys at the age of 12 in the 1700s understood the cost for freedom. They picked up arms and fought beside their fathers for the liberties we take for granted. When you walk around DC you start to understand the impact these men had on this nation. From the Capitol to the Lincoln memorial, you'll see just how much has been given to all of us. It's sad because we're such a ungrateful nation, full of takers not givers. Like JFK said in his inaugural speech, "ask not what your country can do for you, but ask what you can do for your country." Are we doing that? Are we asking, what can I do for my country? Or are we asking, what is this country going to do for me?

Between the bailout and everything else, all I hear is me me me. Our new president asked for a call to service today. I couldn't agree more. Serving each other today will shape our country tomorrow. As a Christian nation we shouldn't have to be asked. We should be actively getting our feet dirty, not just for our neighbors, but for future generations to be inspired by. Just like we are inspired by walking around DC and learning how our former leaders put their country first. We can say to our children, follow our lead. Teaching them to put others above themselves and to embrace the truths our Heavenly Father has given us. The thing I love most about my city is that it has my Father's stamp all over it. His hand is and always has been on this great nation. He has stood beside those brave barefoot 12 year old boys during the Revolution, He brought our country back together after a civil war, and He destroyed the enemies of the world in WWII. It's His might that has given our fighters strength and courage in the mist of death. He is the orginator for CHANGE. And it's because of that great truth, that I can dare to hope for HIS change to come to my Washington, DC.

New York, New York

It was a day like any other when I woke up this January 17th, but today was different because I’m heading on an adventure to New York City….the Big Apple. Of course, I was super tired because I stayed up until 1:30am and got up at 6:30am. It’s my own fault..I was so excited, it was hard to settle down and go to bed. Also, if I’m being honest I was watching some of my favorite DVR’d shows. :-) So, I’m packing up last minute items and running out the door with my puppy. My roommate was sweet enough to drop me off at the metro AND watch my puppy for the long weekend. Chewy came along to drop me off at Dunn Loring and I’m finally I was on my way. I got into the zone, the metro zone..of reading my book (Marley & Me), then listening to music when I transfer lines. Carley and I met up, then we’re OFF in a Bolt Bus to New York City. Now, Carley decided to take a nap right away, but I decided to finish my book. It was the last 30 pages, but they were the most difficult. It took me 2 hours to finish 30 pages because I was reading, crying, reading, crying, reading, crying, etc..until I finished. I went through almost a whole pack of tissues. Warming…if you’re going to read a book about a dog READ AT HOME. After popping a few Advil’s from the cry headache, I was ready for New York City!!

It only took 4 hours to get there and they dropped us off pretty much in the middle of Time Square. First thing was to meet Carley’s sister Elizabeth at the hotel, check in, and get lunch. It is FREAKIN’ FREEZING in the wonderful city. I made the decision on Friday that thermals were going in the suitcase and it was obviously the right choice. Of course, because things can never be perfect my thermals are too big and I kept having to make big steps to keep them up. We went all over Time Square, and then grabbed a cab(thought I was going to DIE) to this book store with 18 miles worth of books. Yeah…it was a big store. Carley was in Heaven! We decided after that to grab dinner and head back to the hotel. We have a huge day tomorrow and needed the rest. I mean we walked miles today, but tomorrow we’ll be walking probably three times as long. I couldn't be happier. I love this mini adventure. I’ve never spent days exploring New York, it’s a little scary, but very liberating. So, we grabbed a New York style pizza and are totally chilling for the rest of the night.

Its days like these that really make me appreciate being young and single. To have this amazing freedom to go where the wind blows is thrilling. Living in the moment is what this weekend is all about and I’m embracing it with both hands. :-)

LOVE YOURSELF..

So, I'm sitting here watching American Idol and these people are cracking me up. They honestly believe they have what it takes to be a star. To everybody else in the country we're like, do you hear yourself, but in their head they're awesome. I can't help but wonder..do I do that?!? I think I do...you know those moments where you're looking through old photos and you're wondering WHAT WAS I THINKING?!?! But you know EXACTLY what you were thinking at the time...I look HOT!! Yeah...I can't help but believe everybody else was thinking DOES SHE HAVE A MIRROR?!? I'm a girl that likes to take fashion risks. I'm a firm believer that people should be able to see your personality through your individual style.

So...I say PEOPLE don't be afraid to be one of a kind. You might get some funny looks, but being true to yourself is priceless and in the end it's all about making yourself happy. I personally will never regret the red lens sunglasses, sailor hat, or Juno Jeans, because they've made me one entertaining chick. And let's be honest I'm sure my fashion mistakes are not over OR at least I hope not, because how boring would that be. ;-)

The song dedicated to this blog is CIRCUS by the Legendary Britney Spears!! One girl that definitely dances to her own drum....

My little reminder...

So, some of you will never understand this feeling, but I wish you could. The feeling of loving something so much it hurts. You feel tears coming if you start to think about being without this special creature that fills your heart with unconditional love. My special creature is my dog Chewy. I don't think anyone besides another dog obsessed owner could understand this love. He gives WAY more to me then I ever could to him. When I'm feeling beaten & broken by daily life, I come home to my little ball of joy, who only wants to be with me. He's content with watching me make dinner, sleeping beside me on the couch, or playing with his toy. He follows me everywhere and gets very upset when I leave him for any random amount of time. If I yell at him for any reason, he doesn't care. He's just begging to stay right beside me. He loves me unconditionally. Me and that little poodle have been through alot over the years, but we always had each other. It's amazing how much strength I've gotten from my little dog. I can't tell you how many times I've been crying and my sweet poodle will cuddle up next to me and try to cheer me up. It always seems to work too...

He's my little reminder from God of how much He loves me. That unconditional presence that He's here, waiting to be noticed, and begging for attention. It's hard to imagine God begging for our attention, huh!? Why us...we're a broken needy people. But no matter what you say or do, He still longs to just be with us. So...this morning as I woke up to a sweet puppy laying across my chest trying to wake me up, I was reminded of how blessed I am. Blessed to have a million daily reminders of My Father's love for me, especially my favorite little reminder Chewy!!